Read: Proverbs 23–26

Today’s Passage: Proverbs 25:9–10

The book of Proverbs continues with valuable insights from the wise. In chapters 23 and 24, we find the thirty sayings of the wise (Prov. 23:1–24:22), including a strong warning about the problems of too much wine (Prov. 23:29–35). Proverbs 24:23–34 offers more sayings of the wise, and chapters 25–26 contain additional proverbs compiled by the men of Hezekiah from the wisdom of Solomon (Prov. 25:1–26:28).

One issue addressed in Proverbs 25:9–10 is both ancient and ongoing—a serious problem that has caused damage for generations. That problem is gossip.

Gossip has been around for a very long time. It has destroyed the reputation of many innocent people and allowed the guilty to thrive. It has broken marriages, friendships, churches, and partnerships. And sadly, gossip is not just a problem “out in the world”—it is also a serious problem in the church. In fact, it can be just as common, if not worse, among Christians. This may be because we know each other well and spend much time together, which makes gossip more tempting and more damaging.

Unfortunately, this is not surprising. While it may not shock many of us, it should. If we truly know the Lord and are committed to His Word, we should not subject others to the pain that gossip causes. Scripture gives us clear guidance on how to deal with conflict, and our words should always be directed by God’s will. “Whoever desires to love life and see good days, let him keep his tongue from evil and his lips from speaking deceit” (1 Peter 3:10, ESV).

Proverbs 25:9–10 offers practical wisdom: “Argue your case with your neighbor himself, and do not reveal another’s secret, lest he who hears you bring shame upon you, and your ill repute have no end.” If you have a problem with someone, go directly to them. Do not involve others who are not part of the matter. This doesn’t mean we shouldn’t seek godly advice, but we must first seek wisdom from the Lord. “If any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask God, who gives generously to all without reproach, and it will be given him” (James 1:5, ESV).

It is always best to resolve matters within the church when possible. Paul wrote in 1 Corinthians 6 that disputes among believers should be handled within the body of Christ, not brought before secular courts. There is no reason to expect worldly systems to resolve issues in a way that pleases God.

Let’s be sure that Scripture guides how we handle conflict. We answer to the Lord, and He expects us to treat one another with love and respect. Jesus said, “If your brother sins against you, go and tell him his fault, between you and him alone…” (Matt. 18:15–17, ESV). Let’s guard our tongues and protect the unity of the church.